Recently a good friend of mine was going through a pretty terrible breakup. I won’t go into all the specifics, but some time had passed and she was starting to regret her decision to break up with her boyfriend.
She wanted to know, “Should I text my ex boyfriend I miss him?”
I think that’s a reasonable question and a pretty common one as well. If you’re here reading this, then I’m sure you also want to know if you should tell your ex you miss him.
I’m going to tell you what I told her, “No, you shouldn’t.”
And here’s why…
After a breakup, most people want a quick fix. They want to find that one “magical text message” that will fix everything and reverse the breakup so they can get their ex back as soon as possible.
It makes sense. I mean breakups absolutely suck. They are heart-wrenching, they make you feel sick to your stomach, you can’t sleep, you can’t eat, and your brain won’t stop running around in circles. It’s miserable.
You feel lonely and that loneliness makes you second guess all your decisions. It makes you miss the companionship. It makes you feel like being alone is worse than being in a relationship, even if that relationship wasn’t very good for you.
I get it. I do. But if you want to get your ex boyfriend back, it’s extremely important to understand what not to text your ex because one slip up can kill the relationship for good.
Texting your ex boyfriend that you miss him falls under the category of being needy and desperate. It gives him all the power. It puts him in control of the relationship.
If things ended badly, he can play you like a fiddle. Once he knows you miss him and desperately want him back, he can have his cake and eat it too. He can enjoy being single, date other women, or just string you along because there’s no more fear of losing you for good.
In his mind, you’re not going anywhere. That puts him in a very powerful position to use you in any way he sees fit.
So if you’re thinking about texting your ex boyfriend that you miss him, I urge you to reconsider before you hit the send button.
As it turns out, there’s a far better way to text an ex you want back that won’t give him all the power or make you appear needy and desperate in the process.